My Autism Insights

It’s been a roller coaster of a weekend for us, and I’m even more convinced that there’s some level of SAD going on with Gus.  His mood swings are disconcerting and I’d be lying if I said they weren’t a little annoying as well.  He’ll be going along just fine and then out of the blue gets very contrary, defiant, and difficult.  He’s even been giving me a hard time about meals, and he’s always been an incredibly good eater.

We spent a very nice day with my sister-in-law and brother-in-law, which included a mountain hike. I thought the outdoor time would do Gus good, and I think it did for a while, but he was also intent on giving me a heart attack.  He made a run toward a sharp drop-off on our way out of the park.  I guess it was a bad idea to have a talk with him about staying away from the cliffs - it seemed to make him curious about what would happen.  He had no fear about them, but before bed he had a meltdown because we’d all been joking about bears being in the park.  He fears the imaginary danger and the real danger is totally lost.  It can be impossible to know what to try to prepare him for and what not to say.

It was also interesting how much he slept yesterday - in the car going to the park, most of the way home, and straight through the night.  I fully expected a 3 am wakeup.

He had a pretty good day today, even though we had to stay in because it was a rainy, snowy mess outside.  He didn’t get grumpy until dinner because I made turkey pot pie, which he usually loves.

Hopefully, the comfort of his school routine will help settle his nerves at least for a couple of weeks, until our routine is shattered again with the holidays.

On a side note, NanoWrimo officially ends tonight, and I finished with an official word count of just over 52,ooo words.  So, now that I’m not obsessively cranking out a novel, hopefully my posts will get a little more interesting again!  Hope you had a great Thanksgiving weekend!  Back to the grind tomorrow!

Interesting question.  So we finally made it to the movies this afternoon to see Wall-E in the second-run theater.   What can I say about Wall-E?

I can say that the short, Presto, at the beginning of the movie was very cute and engaged Gus completely.

I can say that the first fifteen minutes of the movie were very entertaining to DH (dear husband) and me, but MM was a little disturbed and Gus was very interested in the pattern on the wall next to us.

I can say that the popcorn was really overpriced and not worth it - stale.

I can say there’s a good reason we went to see it for $2 instead of $7 or $9.

I can say we probably should have gone to see High School Musical 3 and we may have gotten 45 minutes out of our tickets instead of 15.

I can say I’m glad I waited to buy the DVD because the kids both found the beginning of the movie “sad” (Gus) and “scary” (MM).  They have no desire to watch further.

Is this a negative review of the movie?  Not at all, but I think we’ll be renting from Netflix if we ever want to find out what Eva was looking for.

Happy Thanksgiving to all my American readers, and a general Happy Day to those outside the U.S.!

I’m taking a break from cooking,  cleaning, and watching Teen Titans Trouble in Tokyo  to record what I’m thankful for today:

I am thankful to have my sister coming to visit for the day because we don’t see her nearly enough.   She’s going to spend the night and we may hit the stores bright and early for Black Friday.  Good times!

I am thankful that Gus is pretty calm today and MM has been incredibly helpful, and things are actually getting done - even with me having an audiobook plugged in my ears for most of the morning while I cleaned.   This has so far been one of the most mellow and relaxed holidays we’ve had in a long time.  Thanksgiving 2008 for the win!

I am thankful that my workload is very close to completion and I haven’t cracked yet!  I believe my novel will be complete by the 30th, and all my deadlines will be met by the 1st barring any unforeseen drama.  It’s a nice sense of accomplishment.  And speaking of accomplishment - I see I’ve been awarded another Lemonade Award, and I’m grateful for that too!  So I’ll choose some new recipients tomorrow!

Have a wonderful and safe day, all!  And please share your gratitude in a comment!

Yesterday, I had the brilliant idea that I would take both kids to see Wall-E by myself.  I got over that little moment of crazy.  Instead, I traded for a slightly different crazy.  We tried chocolate today.

Gus has never reacted well to chocolate.  It tends to make him a little ‘nutty.’  But earlier this week the kids helped make brownies for their dad’s birthday, so it seemed wrong to not let him have any.  At least I wasn’t dim enough to give it to him when he had school the next day.  It will be interesting to see if I actually get a full night’s sleep…

I figured earlier would be better, so I let them have brownies for their morning snack.  This may seem irresponsible, but considering we were up at 5 and they’d had breakfast hours before, it wasn’t such a big deal.   He was okay for about 2 hours.

By noon, I turned to look at him and asked myself, “What have you done?”  Jumping on the sofa, racing through the house…typical behaviors for Gus, but with an extra manic glint in his eyes.  It was a little scary.  By two o’clock, I couldn’t take any more, especially since he kept insisting on having Charlie Rose on.  I told the kids to go play in their rooms and we were taking a break from TV.  I spent the next hour wondering if I should call an exorcist.  Holy cow, the meltdown!  Defiance, anger, tears, calling names (mostly toward his sister, not me)…At one point I had to carry him up to his room and got an elbow to the lip (I think that was an accident though).  All that for shutting the TV off for 45 minutes.

We did get outside for a little while and he’s going through bouts of calm and crazy, alternating.

Why did I bother since I could have predicted all these things?  Well, I figured that he’s older now and maybe his body chemistry has changed enough that he can have it once in a while.  Clearly I was wrong.  If I get lucky, it won’t corrupt his system for the usual 48 hours and I might have my boy back by tomorrow.

Thanksgiving Thursday Thankfulness tomorrow!

  Tomorrow begins the Thanksgiving holiday weekend.  While I love having my kids home, there is always the problem of how to entertain them all by my lonesome.  That challenge is compacted right now because I’m working at home so there are deadlines, and more deadlines, and oh yeah look another deadline.  I’ve got editing to do by Friday; 4000 words to write by Monday; and a novel to finish before Sunday.  Then there’s that pesky holiday to get ready for on Thursday.  How do I accomplish all that and still keep two kids busy?  Clearly, I can’t, right?  Or can I?

I have this crazy idea that I can still make a Herculean push these last 5 days and get everything done.   I think I may have to give up a few extra hours of sleep this week, perhaps just not sleep the rest of the week.  I plan to bribe the children with a movie if they give me a few hours to work tomorrow - High School Musical 3.  Or maybe we’ll check out Wall-E at the second-run theater.  And while I am fully aware that attempting to take the both of them to a movie on my own is probably a good indicator the beginnings of a nervous breakdown, I’m going to try it anyway.

Could it be that I’m sounding like the breakdown’s already begun? Not quite - close, but not quite.  Just having a strange combination of manic energy and not wanting to do anything but listen to Twilight on audio - otherwise known as procrastination.  See, so why should my kids be cooped up because I’m a chronic procrastinator?

I’m not sure how the loudness will sit with Gus, and MM may get bored halfway through.  I fully expect that one will end up wanting to leave and the other will want to stay…or one will want to roam and the other will want to sit.  It will likely be a disaster.  But what’s one more disaster to the big dope who managed to get so overloaded with stuff to do?  We’ll just call it an adventure and move on.

Plus, it will give me something to blog about tomorrow, providing we’re all still in one piece.  My posting may be sparse for the next few days.  There’s only so many words my brain can process in a day.

So, if I don’t post tomorrow or the day after, wishing you all a wonderful Thanksgiving and wish me luck that my brain survives the next few days!

Thanks to Mo from Manic Monday

From YourDictionary.com : Harvest - noun - 4. the outcome or consequence of any effort or series of events.

This is the time of year when we typically receive the harvest of Gus’s efforts during his first quarter of school: his report cards.  He gets two reports - a district report card and an IEP report.  I was a little dismayed to see that the two reports were very different.  So during our parent-teacher conference, I asked why this was.

The district report shows his progress and ability in very generalized areas.  The IEP shows his progress in the specific areas that have been targeted for this year.  Generally, he’s doing fine.  But the specifics are pretty shaky.  There were several ‘not progressing satisfactorily’ marks, mostly having to do with his ability to focus and attend to tasks.  Yet, the meeting made me feel more hopeful.

After Thanksgiving, his teacher will be implementing computer time into the routine, and Gus will be allowed to complete at least some of his independent work on a computer.  So there will be no need for us to buy him a laptop for school, and as a matter of fact, the teacher would prefer he not use one in school because it would likely become a deterrent to complete some of the other things he has to do during the day - like group work.  That’s fine with me, and I think that any amount of computer time will be a benefit for him.

So come next harvest time, probably around the time just before or after the New Year, hopefully the results on his IEP report will be a little more positive.  At least I am certain that his teachers’ and therapists’ attitudes toward him are positive, and that is always a good thing.

This morning, Gus - the second grader - woke up with a question on his mind: How many zeros in a billion?  How the heck was I supposed to know?  So we tried an experiment.  I had made the suggestion to his teacher that he might be able to focus a little better during independent work if he had a laptop to work on, and I said I’d try letting him do some work on his own at home.  This morning seemed to be as good a time as any.  So we logged on to the Internet, I wrote down the question for him and told him how to do a web search.  Our Kidzui search was fruitless, so I told him he could use the grownup Internet.  Very exciting.

Sure enough, we found a site with the answers - more answers than we could have possibly even thought to ask for.  It was like Christmas morning.  We talked about why anyone would need to use such big numbers, and even a little about how scientists  don’t bother writing all those zeros, but use a special way of writing how many there are (because you’re never too young to know about scientific notation).  And that’s not even the most interesting thing to me, that my second grader now knows how many zeros there are in a quintillion.

At school, his behavior was different.  He wasn’t bouncing off the walls, but instead was just zoning out in his own little world.  It was such a pronounced difference that his teacher wrote me a long note about it.  She seemed perplexed.

But I have a pretty good idea what he was thinking about.  I’d be my last dollar that he was envisioning all those zeros in a centillion.  Wouldn’t you?

I’m feeling particularly thankful today after reading some distressing things…

First, I’m thankful to be married to a Social Worker who has a clear understanding of the DSM-IV, which is the manual of diagnostic criteria for the mental-health field.   It’s hard enough to explain what it is, let alone follow all the complicated requirements for any diagnosis.

I am thankful for not only the brief time I spent as a teache, but for the environment I taught in.  I worked with incarcerated youth, ages 12-17, and most of them were eitehr functunally illiterate or had learning disabilities.  It made the job challenging, but it also taught me how to teach outside the box.  As I struggle to advocate for Gus, it really comes in handy being able to understand the different challenges facing the teacher, and it is useful to be able to come up with little tricks to help him and those who are working with him.

Finally, and this is the really important one, I am thankful that I am fortunate enough to have both my children living with me, safe and sound.  Niksmom posted about Frankie Macias, who has been institutionalized since 1994 - on a temporary placement.  Frankie has suffered horrible abuses, has been denied access to his family, and even though a community-based placement has finally been obtained for him, the Department for Developmental Disabilitiesin New Jersey has refused to release him!

So, please sign the petition asking Governor Corzine to have Franie released so that he might have a chance at healing and living his life.

Have a great night, and please share your gratitude in a comment.

Janet at Dolly’s Daily Diary was kind enough to nominate me for the Lemonade Award which is given to bloggers who have shown a positive attitude and/or gratitude.  So, thanks to Janet for the honor!

The rules:

Put the logo on your blog or post.
• Nominate at least 10 blogs which show great Attitude and/or Gratitude!
• Be sure to link to your nominees within your post.
• Let them know that they have received this award by commenting on their blog.
• Share the love and link to this post and to the person from whom you received your award.

So here are some of my favorite blogs that inspire me to stay as positive as they do:

Marla Baltes on All That is Dazilous

A Life Less Ordinary

Mother of Shrek

Whitterer on Autism

Bon Bon Gazette

Memoirs of a Chaotic Mommy

Live Life 365

Mayhem Arts

On the Verge

Pregnant with Cancer

Drop by and check out these wonderful blogs!

Also, just a note to those of you who have taken the time to comment, I do read an appreciate every comment left, even if I don’t always respond.  So, thank you very much!  Have a great night!

image courtesy of Jannagraphics

‘Tis the season for Seasonal Affective Disorder!  Thanks to Mo of Manic Monday for the prompt, which made something click in my brain this morning that may explain some things about Gus’s recent behavior.

Seasonal Affective Disorder or SAD is a type of depression that usually strikes during the winter months.  More younger people and women are affected, and it can have an impact on children as well as adults.  This condition is likely caused by the reduction in daylight hours, which alters the body’s circadian rhythms (sleep/wake cycles) and levels of melatonin and serotonin in the body - hormones that affect sleep and mood respectively.

Common symptoms in children may include: mood changes, changes in appetite, sleep disturbances, low energy, and trouble concentrating among others.

I bring up the symptoms for children because I think this could be the answer to some of the issues Gus has been having lately and tends to have every winter.  I always knew that he was affected in some way by the colder months, but I never related it to the light, I always thought it was a matter of cold.  However, it’s all making perfect sense - the sudden sleep problems, his waning ability to focus in school, his increasing irritability (especially this past weekend), his disinterest in going out….These could all be individual and unrelated problems, but they could also be related to SAD.  Unfortunately, I was unable to locate studies or statistics about how SAD in autistic individuals.

One of the most common treatments for Seasonal Affective Disorder is light therapy.  If light boxes are too expensive, or if it’s not practical to think your child can sit in front of a light box for 30 minutes or so, there are also light visors (also pricey), or you could try full spectrum lighting.  While there is no evidence that this will cure SAD, they are closer to natural lights than standard light bulbs or CFLs.  And they do make full spectrum CFLs if you are energy and environmentally conscientious.

Other means of relief to try: melatonin to help with sleep disturbances (it’s been working pretty well for us so far), outdoor exercise, proper diet (cravings for sweets and carbs is also common), talk therapy, or antidepressants prescribed by a doctor.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to hide this bag of chips, and I’m going to find some full spectrum lights.  Gus may or may not be  seasonally effected, but I definitely am.  Funny how I’m only motivated to do something about it when it might be causing my son a problem.

Have a great day and Happy Monday!